


Operation: “Your Son Isn’t Good Enough for My Son” (the Duet)

by Jantique



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Established Relationship, Humor, M/M, Mothers-in-law, Song Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-04
Updated: 2014-03-04
Packaged: 2018-01-14 14:13:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1269445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jantique/pseuds/Jantique
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Song Parody, to the tune of, “How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria?” from <span class="u">The Sound of Music</span>. Sung by Doris McGarrett and Clara Williams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Operation: “Your Son Isn’t Good Enough for My Son” (the Duet)

**Author's Note:**

> With apologies to Messrs. Rodgers and Hammerstein.
> 
> BTW, I would love to see a story wherein Mss. McGarrett and Williams join forces. They would be Totally Unstoppable! Just sayin'!

CLARA WILLIAMS: CW                  DORIS McGARRETT: DM

 

CW:      How do you solve a problem like McGarrett?

            Grenades inside a car—who lives like that?!

            How do you solve a problem like McGarrett?

            Always inviting my Danny upstairs to see his tatt! 

            A bad influence on my sweet, innocent baby—

            He won’t hear a bad word about his precious “Steve”!

            But the man doesn’t know the law—

            Couldn’t care less from what I saw—

            I know someday he will make my poor boy grieve.

            Oh, how do you solve a problem like McGarrett?

            How do I make Danny see it’s time to _leave_?!

 

DM:    How do you solve a problem like a Williams?

            Opinionated, loud, full of hot air.

            Not even tall enough to be attractive,

            And seriously, how much gel is in his hair?!

            Steve had a good career out in the Navy.

            He could get back on track again, I know.

            This “bromance” will drag him down—

            The man is simply a clown—

            Maybe the CIA … uh, well, maybe no.

            Oh, how do you solve a problem like a Williams?

            How do I make Steve see it’s time to _go_?!

 

DM:    He can outpester any pest!

CW:    Drive a hornet from its nest!

DM:    He can set a whirling dervish out of whirl!

CW:   He is genuinely wild!

DM:   A divorced man with a child!

CW:   He’s too daring!

DM:   He’s a demon!

BOTH: _HE’S NOT A GIRL_!!!

 

CW:     Rachel had faults, but at least she was female.

DM:     That nice Lt. Rollins is female, too.

BOTH:  But now they say, in a week,

           The wedding is on the beach.

DM:     In dress whites—

CW:     Suit and tie—

BOTH:  But _with no shoes_!!! 

            Oh, how do you solve a problem like {McGarrett/Williams}?

            I need a new dress—how would I look in _blue_?!

-5- END -0-

 


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